The Wedding Race
by The Poisoned Doughnut Of DOOM
Summary: Whoever gets married and has a kid first gets the kingdom, Fire Lord Ozai proclaimed. Azula and Zuko sprinted away. Azulaang Zutara WARNING! Slightly disturbing. OK, really disturbing!


Fire Lord Ozai looked at the four people standing in front of his with disgust.

"Let me get this straight. Azula: You managed to capture the Avatar, imprisoned him, only to fall _in love with him_?"

Azula nodded. She was tucked comfortably under Aang's arm.

"And Zuko: You captured the Water Tribe peasant to set a trap for the Avatar only to fall _in love with her_?"

Zuko nodded. Katara was under his arm and his hand had ended up where…if Sokka knew Zuko would be **dead**.

Ozai groaned to himself.

"My only children both fell in love! My daughter fell in love with an **Air Nomad** and my son loves a **Water Tribe peasant**! Whoever I give the kingdom to, I'll be a laughingstock!"

"Hey!"all four of the lovers cried.

"So I'll just make you compete for the kingdom! Whoever can get married and have an heir first gets the kingdom."

Katara, Aang, Azula, and Zuko looked at each other before sprinting off in search of a judge.

---------

Aang and Azula saw a judge.

"Oy! Judge!"

He stopped.

"Marry us right this instant! I command you!" Azula screamed. Her awesome power to terrify people rose up.

The terrified judge sprang into action.

"We are gathereed here today—"

"**HURRY UP!"**

"Azula, do you take Aang to be your---"

"**YES!"  
**

"And Aang! Do you take Azula----"

"**YES, DAMMIT!"**

"I now pronounce you man and wife!"

Azula grabbed Aang's hand and sprinted away dragging him.

"Where are we going?" Aang asked.

"To my bedroom! The kingdom depends on it, my Fire Prince!"

"Hey! I'm a Fire Prince!"

They reached Azula's room. Azula flung Aang (rather roughly) on her bed.

----------

While that was happening, Zuko and Katara had been eagerly searching out a judge.

They found the same traumatized judge who had married Aang and Azula who were currently…gaining control of the kingdom.

"Judge-y! Marry us or your face will look like mine!"

"Aaaaah! Prince Zuko, do you take this woman to be your lawfully---"

"**Yeah, sure, now move it or lose it!"**

"And Katara, do you take this man to be----"

"**YES!"**

"I now pronounce you man and wife!"

"Yes! Fire Lord, here I come!" He turned to the judge. "Make sure no one gets into this corridor. My wife and I have some '_buiness_' to do."

The judge ran in terror and Zuko and Katara preformed their "_buiness_" on the corridor floor.

-----One Month Later-----

The four, now married, lovers stood before Fire Lord Ozai.

"Now, last month, you had to get married and sire an heir. Let's check your progress! Azula, you first!"

"Why her first?"

"Because **she** captured the Avatar."

"Well, Daddy, Aang and I got married. So HA!"

"Well HA to you too! Katara and I got married!"

"DARN IT!"

"Okay, so you're both married." Fire Lord Ozai said. He was starting to get a headache. "Let's move on to the second part of the challenge. Azula? Are you knocked up yet?"

"Yep! I saw the palace docter this morning! Aangy's gonna be a daddy!"

"YES!" cheered Aang.

"NO!" sobbed Zuko.

"Hold on! I also went to the palace docter this morning!" Katara said with an evil glint in her eye. "And I'm knocked up too! MEH!" she said sticking her tongue out.

Fire Lord Ozai slammed his head repeatedly on the armrest of his throne.

"All right, whoever gives birth first get's the kingdom."

-----Eight Months Later-----

Four people stood in front of Fire Lord Ozai again. But this time, two of them were extremely fat.

Azula and Katara were both nearly nine months pregnant.

"Well, daughter, daughter-in-law, you're both extremely pregnant. Sooooooooo whoever has their baby first wins!"

Aang leaned forward and whispered in Azula's ear.

"Great idea!" she exclaimed. Azula started jumping up and down.

"No fair! That's cheating!" Zuko yelled. "Katara! Jump!"

Katara started jumping too.

Fire Lord Ozai groaned. This was going very badly. And very disturbing-ly.

He was wrenched from his thoughts when he heard two large disgusting splashes. Katara and Azula looked shocked.

"Uh oh," Fire Lord Ozai groaned. A few seconds later, Katara and Azula started screaming.

"I'll get the palace doctor," he said before leaving the room.

Aang looked very disgusted for a 112-year-old. "I think I'm gonna throw up!" he moaned.

"Me too!" a very green Zuko agreed. They sprinted out the door.

-----A few **EXTREMELY PAINFUL HOURS** later-----

Fire Lord Ozai stood in front of seven people. Azula, Aang, Aang Jr., Katara, Zuko, Zuko Jr., and the palace doctor.

"Doctor! Who had the baby first?"

The doctor shrugged. "It sounds impossible, but they both gave birth at exactly the same time. It's almost like fate is teasing you."

Fire Lord Ozai slammed his head on every hard surface he could find.

"That's it! Azula, Aang, Aang Jr., just take the throne! I don't care anymore!"

He then jumped out the window.

Azula and Aang cheered.

"I'M THE FIRE LADY!"

"I'M THE FIRE LORD SLASH AVATAR!"

"All that work for **nothing**," Katara grumbled.

"I didn't think it was for nothing," Zuko said.

_**The End!**_

(Finally!)

**(A/N I just wrote this to try to dislodge my writer's block. It's flaring up.**

**Oh, and just for fun, that whole jump-up-and-down-to-go-into-labor-thing was based on a true event in my life. My third cousin was pregnant and we were having a party. **

**My great uncle was going on a three week trip and asked my third cousin to either have the baby now or wait three weeks. When she told my mom that, my mom said "Jump up and down."**

**She didn't.)**


End file.
